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kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

Young and oversexed no happier: survey

Randy Shore
CanWest News Service


Sunday, October 07, 2007


When you give the numbers a hard look, the truth is just what you've always suspected -- about 20 per cent of the people are having 80 per cent of the sex.

Younger people are piling up large numbers of sexual partners and employing high technology in their search for satisfaction, but in the end they are no happier than the rest of us, according to a B.C. poll.

"It's really just a few people doing the heavy lifting with a small group reporting more than 31 partners," said Ipsos Reid pollster Kyle Braid. "And the number of partners is much higher among those who are not satisfied with their sex life."

Those aged 35 to 54 may be married, but are adventurous about where they have sex and which toys they use, and they have accumulated an impressive average of 17 different sex partners.

For those 55 and up, more than half report not having any sex at all in the past 30 days, though about 14 per cent still have sex more than six times a month.

The Ipsos Reid Survey was commissioned by CanWest News Service about the sex lives of 1,571 people who live in B.C.'s Lower Mainland. All the numbers quoted exclude the three per cent of respondents who say they have never had sex, and are considered accurate within 2.5 percentage points.

About 40 per cent of 18- to 34-year-olds said they have sex six or more times a month and 73 per cent of those in a committed relationship -- but not married -- are having sex at least four times a month.

The people who are doing it the most are in a committed relationship but not yet married, the pollster explained.

"Young people are having a lot of sex," but, he said "What really defines them is their use of technology."

They are three times as likely to have had sex over the Internet and four times more likely to have had phone sex than people over 55. They are more than twice as likely to use porn with a sex partner or indulge in sado-masochism.

Despite all that adventure, this younger demographic is no more likely to report satisfaction with their sex lives than anyone else, Braid said.

© The Calgary Herald 2007
Firukurji
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Post by Firukurji »

Strong Religious Views Decrease Teens' Likelihood of Having Sex
Teens — particularly girls — with strong religious views are less likely to have sex than are less religious teens, largely because their religious views lead them to view the consequences of having sex negatively. According to a recent analysis of the NICHD-funded Add Health Survey, religion reduces the likelihood of adolescents engaging in early sex by shaping their attitudes and beliefs about sexual activity.
The study also found that parents' religious beliefs and attitudes toward sex did not directly influence teens' decisions to have sex. Rather, parents' attitudes toward sex seemed to influence their teens' own attitudes toward sex, and indirectly, their teens' behavior.
When teens do have sex, their beliefs about the consequences of sexual activity become more permissive — meaning more positive or favorable — but their religious views do not change.
In particular, adolescent girls who had sex reported that they were more positive about having sex in the future. However, the greatest predictor of whether teens would have sex — regardless of their religious views or attitudes — was whether or not they were dating.
Sexual intercourse places teens at risk for sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV, and unintended pregnancy. The information provided by the study may prove important for health researchers and planners devising programs that help prevent teens from engaging in sexual activity.
"A better understanding of why religious adolescents are less likely to engage in early sexual intercourse may help in designing prevention programs for this behavior," said Duane Alexander, M.D., Director of the NICHD.
kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

Mentors help teens resist temptation

Graeme Morton
Calgary Herald


Saturday, November 17, 2007


Calgary church leaders need to do a better job talking to teens about sexuality in a pop-culture society that's infused with a "go-for-it" mentality.

That's the advice from Jill Kulhawy, the founder of Gammagirls, an international mentorship program that gives teenage girls a Christian alternative to the pervasive media message that premarital sex is the norm.

"Are all the youth valued in your church, not just the good musicians or the natural leaders?" Kulhawy asked those attending Thursday's Calgary Evangelical Ministerial Association meeting.

"Is your church a place of grace for young girls who are pregnant or for teens who are

really struggling with the temptations of their age?"

Kulhawy, who works at the Calgary Pregnancy Care Centre, developed the Gammagirls program to help girls between 13 and 17 deal with issues of sexuality, self-image, risk management and communication within a Christian context. The 10-week mentoring program has been conducted in dozens of Calgary churches and is spreading across Canada, the U.S. and even overseas.

"Spirituality is the strength of our program," said Kulhawy. "Girls in our churches have as many sexuality issues as those who don't go to church."

Kulhawy noted rates of sexual activity in teenage girls who attend church aren't much lower than their peers in the general population, where more than 45 per cent of females between 14 and 19 years old say they've had sex.

Confronted by an omnipresent media where sex is front-and-centre, Kulhawy said today's teens hunger to fill internal needs from external sources. Their emotions are in overdrive, but their capacity to connect immediate actions to long-term consequences has yet to mature.

"And once they've crossed the line with sex, teens are much more likely to get into other problems with drinking, pornography or drugs," Kulhawy said.

She noted teen romances usually last between two and five months and often break up after initial experiments with sex, leaving participants at least depressed and at worst carrying a sexually transmitted disease, or pregnant.

"We're fighting a difficult, toxic environment," Kulhawy told local church leaders. "Teens need positive adult role models and we need to give them a place where they can see healthy relationships in action."

More information is available a www.gammagirls.org.

gmorton@theherald.canwest.com

© The Calgary Herald 2007
kmaherali
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Many young females not using condoms: survey

CanWest News Service


Friday, November 30, 2007


A new national poll focusing on birth control and the sexual attitudes of young women between 16 and 24 suggests there's plenty of room for concern when it comes to risky sexual behaviour by youths.

They survey found two-thirds of women polled said they don't use a condom every time they have sex.

And one in five females never use a condom during sex, the poll found, and 72 per cent don't take birth control correctly.

The Leger Marketing poll was based on interviews with 600 Canadian women, and has a margin of error of plus or minus four points, 19 times out of 20.

For Saleema Noon, a Vancouver consultant who works with school-age children, one of the most worrisome results of the study shows that some women do not insist sexual partners use condoms.

"I think this study highlights the fact that we still have a lot of teaching to do when it comes to (Sexually Transmitted Infection) prevention," she said.

"AIDS is not (necessarily) what we are worried about," she said. "There are many other STIs that are way more common among teens . . . chlamydia, gonorrhea, human papilloma virus.

"I try and get teens away from thinking about the big 'A' and focus on things that they are more likely to get but can still have a significant impact on their lives."

© The Calgary Herald 2007
kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

Talking homosexuality with kids never easy
Kim Gray
Calgary Herald
Monday, December 03, 2007

The questions are coming. You know they are. It's just a matter of time.
Meanwhile, how you as a parent will respond is worth considering.

At least, this is the opinion of one Calgary parenting consultant and I'm
inclined to agree with her.

I'm not just talking about sex. I'm talking about the question of
homosexuality. And how you -- no matter what your beliefs are -- plan to
address the topic when it surfaces.

"You need to practise what you're going to say. So your children's initial
questions don't freak you out so much that they never ask you a question
again," says consultant Julie Freedman Smith of Calgary's Parenting Power.

"It was much less common for our generation's parents to talk about
homosexuality, which is why so many of us are uncomfortable. We don't have a script to work from," she says.

She encourages parents, who want to read up on children and sexuality, to pick up a copy of Justin Richardson's Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids to Know about Sex but Were Afraid They'd Ask (Random House, 2003).

"These days, our kids are exposed to so much," she says. "Especially through the media. We need to be prepared. There's a whole chapter in this book as well on what to do if you think your child might be gay and how to go there, how to give them support."

Still, I'm wondering, why, in this day and age -- when so many of us have
gay and lesbian friends and relatives who are open about their sexual
preferences -- is talking about homosexuality uncomfortable?

The fact is -- according to Dr. Justin Richardson (who, aside from writing
the said book, is an assistant professor of psychiatry at Columbia and
Cornell universities) -- our generation is flying by the seat of our pants.

"We're facing a new challenge. When we were little kids, we probably weren't in kindergarten with playmates who had two moms or two dads," says Richardson during a telephone conversation from his office in New York City.

"We're hesitant because as adults we think that to talk about gay families
is to talk about gay sex. Therefore parents are squeamish. I can promise you that while an adult might think of a gay couple and think of them having sex, a second grader will not think that abstractly. They're just thinking that they're two people in love who happen to be same sex -- who aren't that different from Mom and Dad," says Richardson.

"It's also common for people to wonder that if they talk about gay issues,
they may influence their child's eventual sexual orientation," he says.
"Because nobody is able to say, 'This is what makes someone gay.' So parents naturally want to be careful and conservative."

That said, Richardson firmly believes, as do other experts in the field,
that being educated about homosexuality is not a factor when it comes to a child's sexual orientation.

What's more, if kids ask us questions and we don't answer them, we're
teaching them to clam up. "Eventually, when your son might need a condom and doesn't know where to get one, he might not ask you. And he may end up having unprotected sex. Plus, you want your child to come to you if he or she sees something puzzling on the Internet."

Freedman Smith says parents should answer questions in an age-specific way. When her daughter was three, for example, she would say she "loved her best friend and was going to be in love with her" forever.

"Then we'd talk about the difference between friend love and romantic adult love," she says. Couples, in her children's minds, have always been men and women -- but they have also been women and women, and men and men.

"That's the way the world is. These are our friends," says Freedman Smith.

As your children ages, the conversation can become more abstract.

"Then we can start to talk about how people are different but how we are the same as well," she says.

"A person may feel physical love for someone of the same gender, but they still hurt and bleed the same as the rest of us."

The key is to let kids know that even though it may feel weird asking
questions, you're listening. "You can admit you may not have all the
answers," she says. "But it's important to say you're willing to help do the
research."

Like most parents, I am constantly surprised at the learning curve involved when you raise a family.

Our goal as parents is to orient our children in a complex world so they can eventually fend for themselves -- all the while being sensitive to their
place, and the place of others, in a diverse society.

If this is my goal, then my plan this weekend is to pick up a copy of
Richardson's second book: the award-winning And Tango Makes Three (Simon and Schuster, 2005).

"It's a book for young children based on a true story about how two male
penguins at the Central Park Zoo wanted a chick so much they tried to hatch a rock. The zoo keeper found them an egg and they raised a lovely female penguin named Tango," says Richardson.

The book, he says, is not a civics "gay-people-are-good" lesson. Rather,
it's a book kids love that introduces the notion of "non-traditional"
families to children in a matter-of-fact way.

A life lesson taught through the eyes of three penguins? Sounds good to me. I don't know about you, but I need all the help I can get.

Kim Gray is a journalist and mother of two; she welcomes your feedback as well as column ideas at modernfamily@theherald.canwest.com

Helpful Resource

Interested in a copy of Parenting Power's course about kids and sexuality,
Yikes -- How do I answer that? Check out parentingpower.ca

© The Calgary Herald 2007
kmaherali
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December 6, 2007
Teenage Birth Rate Rises for First Time Since ’91
By GARDINER HARRIS

WASHINGTON, Dec. 5 — The birth rate among teenagers 15 to 19 in the United States rose 3 percent in 2006, according to a report issued Wednesday, the first such increase since 1991. The finding surprised scholars and fueled a debate about whether the Bush administration’s abstinence-only sexual education efforts are working.

The federal government spends $176 million annually on such programs. But a landmark study recently failed to demonstrate that they have any effect on delaying sexual activity among teenagers, and some studies suggest that they may actually increase pregnancy rates.

“Spending tens of million of tax dollars each year on programs that hurt our children is bad medicine and bad public policy,” said Dr. David A. Grimes, vice president of Family Health International, a nonprofit reproductive health organization based in North Carolina.

Robert Rector, a senior research fellow with the Heritage Foundation, said that blaming abstinence-only programs was “stupid.” Mr. Rector said that most young women who became pregnant were highly educated about contraceptives but wanted to have babies.

President Bush noted the long decline in teenage pregnancy rates in his 2006 State of the Union address, saying, “Wise policies such as welfare reform, drug education and support for abstinence and adoption have made a difference in the character of our country.”

The White House did not respond to requests for comment Wednesday.

In a speech last year, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton said that rates of teenage pregnancy declined during the Clinton administration because of a focus on family planning.

Teenage birth rates are driven by rates of sex, contraception and abortion. In the 1990s, teenage sex rates dropped and condom use rose because teenagers were scared of AIDS, said Dr. John S. Santelli, chairman of the department of population and family health at Columbia University.

But recent advances in AIDS treatments have lowered concerns about the disease, and AIDS education efforts, which emphasized abstinence and condom use, have flagged.

Perhaps as a result, teenage sex rates have risen since 2001 and condom use has dropped since 2003. Abortion rates have held steady for a decade, although numbers from 2005 and 2006 are not available.

Kristin A. Moore, a senior scholar at Child Trends, a nonprofit children’s research organization, said the increase in the teenage birth rate was particularly alarming because even the 2005 rate was far higher than that in other industrialized countries.

“It’s really quite disappointing because we weren’t close to reaching our goal,” Dr. Moore said.

The lone bright spot in Wednesday’s report, issued by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, was that the birth rate for girls 14 and under dropped to 0.6 percent per 1,000 from 0.7 percent. Birth rates rose 3 percent among teenagers ages 15 to 17 and 4 percent among those ages 18 and 19.

The largest increase came among black teenagers, but increases were also seen among whites, Hispanics and American Indians. Birth rates among Asian teenagers continued to drop.

Unmarried childbearing reached a record high in 2006, according to the disease control centers, with unmarried mothers now accounting for 38.5 percent of all births. Births among teenagers and unmarried women tend to lead to poor outcomes for their children.

Helping to prevent these pregnancies was the reason advocates pushed for the wide availability of the morning-after pill known as Plan B. The Food and Drug Administration approved sales of Plan B without a prescription in August 2006, too late to have any effect on that year’s birth rate.

Mr. Rector of the Heritage Foundation said that teenage and unmarried birth rates were driven by the same factors: young women with little education who are devoted to mothering but see no great need to be married.

“We should be telling them that for the well-being of any child, it’s critically important that you be over the age of 20 and that you be married,” he said. “That message is not given at all.”

Dr. Santelli of Columbia said that many abstinence-only educational efforts tended to emphasize that contraceptives often fail. “They scare kids about contraception,” he said.

The report also found that the Caesarean delivery rate continued its rise, increasing 3 percent in 2006 to 31.1 percent of all births, a record. In recent years, women who have had one birth by Caesarean have often been discouraged from having subsequent births vaginally. And there is some evidence that a growing number of women are requesting Caesareans to avoid pain or vaginal stretching.

The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists published a position paper last month stating that some Caesareans-upon-request should be discouraged. Women who have multiple Caesarean births are more likely to suffer uterine rupture and other serious consequences.

Dr. Robert Freeman, a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of California, Irvine, said that managed-care companies no longer discouraged Caesareans and malpractice fears often led doctors to opt for Caesarean at the first hint of trouble.

“These numbers are bad news,” Dr. Freeman said, “and I think it’s only going to get worse.”

For the first time since 1971, the nation’s overall fertility rate rose past the replacement rate, increasing 2 percent in 2006 to 2,101 births per 1,000 women. Women of almost every age had more children last year than the year before, except girls under 15 and women over 45.
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Sex education failing to curb risky encounters by teenagers

Susan Martinuk
For The Calgary Herald


Friday, December 28, 2007


A Leger Marketing survey on the sexual attitudes of Canada's young women suggests our current approach to sex education isn't working.

Comprehensive, no-holds barred sex education programs were supposed to produce women who are knowledgeable, confident and capable of making smart sexual decisions.

But the survey reveals a very different product: A generation who are sloppy and unknowledgeable about birth control, and relatively unconcerned about risky sexual behaviours.

Despite being pummelled with the 'always use a condom' philosophy, one in five women (aged 16-24) never use condoms. Age and maturity don't matter much, as condom use declines with age. Surprisingly, 23 to 24 year-olds are more likely to not use them than their younger counterparts.

About 90 per cent of these "one in five" are/have been on oral contraceptives (OCs). But that's of little comfort, since they apparently believe that OCs are capable of protecting them against sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).

If this data is concerning, so is its interpretation by the so-called experts. The Canada-wide news story quoted Saleema Noon, a Vancouver-based, private sexual-health educator. The statistics on birth control pills set off alarm bells for her -- but not for reasons you might think. Her great concern is that 71 per cent of women aren't committed to any particular brand of OC and are open to switching.

The market is about to be flooded by generic OCs. Without a strong commitment to brand-name contraceptives, Noon believes young women will be attracted to the cheaper generic pills that may have different side effects and "haven't been subjected to the rigorous testing" of brand-name pills. As such, she reminds young people it is their "right" to "specifically ask for that brand name" product, and encourages them to stick to it, regardless of price or recommendations of health professionals.

But her worries are false and misleading. Generic drugs have the exact same chemistry as brand-name drugs, and Noon should know that. (Perhaps we should be asking which pharmaceutical companies are supporting Noon and her sales pitch for brand-name products.)

If prominent educators are passing on the wrong information about OCs, it explains some of the confusion exhibited by those who are the products of that education. But it also suggests we should be highly concerned about the accuracy of the information sex educators are handing out.

A second concern raised by this survey is the prominent shift in attitudes towards casual sex. One in four women has what is popularly called a "friend with benefits" (a casual sex partner with no formal relationship or expectations), and 16 per cent of these never use condoms in such situations.

This is the product of our latest sexual revolution: a 'hook-up' culture, where the relationship norm is no dating or commitments; just sex. It seems sex has been recast as a recreational activity, leading one American writer to call it "the new midnight basketball."

Naturally, this attitude has led to an unprecedented epidemic of STDs. Yet sex educators refuse to respond by encouraging changes in sexual behaviour. Instead, they have tweaked the "safe sex" moniker to "safer sex" and worked with Planned Parenthood to change the nasty term "STD" to a more friendly "STI" (sexually transmitted infection) in an effort to alleviate young peoples' worries about STDs.

But STDs aren't always curable, they can recur throughout a lifetime, and they have been implicated in causing infertility, pelvic inflammatory disease and the vast majority of the cases of cervical cancer. That's why I refuse to follow suit and falsely communicate the idea that STD infections can easily be cured without any serious or lasting consequences.

Our teens leave high school with more knowledge about sexuality and greater access to birth control than ever before. Yet, somehow, they aren't getting the right message.

One of the most telling stories about attitudes toward sex and how we should respond is a 1993 news story about a high school athletic clique called the Spur Posse.

California police laid rape charges against eight of the elite athletes when it was discovered the group had a competition that awarded a point each time the members had sex with a different girl. The leader had 66 points.

The heart of the problem was revealed when one of the arrested teens told The New York Times, "They pass out condoms, teach sex education and pregnancy-this and pregnancy-that. But they don't teach us any rules."

We expect teens to enter the adult world of sexuality without any rules or expectations -- other than to wear a condom.

Evidently, the biggest problem with sex education may be what we aren't saying to our kids.

Susan Martinuk's column appears every Friday.

© The Calgary Herald 2007
kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

January 13, 2008
Op-Ed Contributor
Sex and the Teenage Girl
By CAITLIN FLANAGAN
Los Angeles

THE movie “Juno” is a fairy tale about a pregnant teenager who decides to have her baby, place it for adoption and then get on with her life. For the most part, the tone of the movie is comedic and jolly, but there is a moment when Juno tells her father about her condition, and he shakes his head in disappointment and says, “I thought you were the kind of girl who knew when to say when.”

Female viewers flinch when he says it, because his words lay bare the bitterly unfair truth of sexuality: female desire can bring with it a form of punishment no man can begin to imagine, and so it is one appetite women and girls must always regard with caution. Because Juno let her guard down and had a single sexual experience with a sweet, well-intentioned boy, she alone is left with this ordeal of sorrow and public shame.

In the movie, the moment passes. Juno finds a yuppie couple eager for a baby, and when the woman tries to entice her with the promise of an open adoption, the girl shakes her head adamantly: “Can’t we just kick it old school? I could just put the baby in a basket and send it your way. You know, like Moses in the reeds.”

It’s a hilarious moment, and the sentiment turns out to be genuine. The final scene of the movie shows Juno and her boyfriend returned to their carefree adolescence, the baby — safely in the hands of his rapturous and responsible new mother — all but forgotten. Because I’m old enough now that teenage movie characters evoke a primarily maternal response in me (my question during the film wasn’t “What would I do in that situation?” but “What would I do if my daughter were in that situation?”), the last scene brought tears to my eyes. To see a young daughter, faced with the terrible fact of a pregnancy, unscathed by it and completely her old self again was magical.

And that’s why “Juno” is a fairy tale. As any woman who has ever chosen (or been forced) to kick it old school can tell you, surrendering a baby whom you will never know comes with a steep and lifelong cost. Nor is an abortion psychologically or physically simple. It is an invasive and frightening procedure, and for some adolescent girls it constitutes part of their first gynecological exam. I know grown women who’ve wept bitterly after abortions, no matter how sound their decisions were. How much harder are these procedures for girls, whose moral and emotional universe is just taking shape?

Even the much-discussed pregnancy of 16-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears reveals the rudely unfair toll that a few minutes of pleasure can exact on a girl. The very fact that the gossip magazines are still debating the identity of the father proves again that the burden of sex is the woman’s to bear. He has a chance to maintain his privacy, but if she becomes pregnant by mistake, soon all the world will know.

Pregnancy robs a teenager of her girlhood. This stark fact is one reason girls used to be so carefully guarded and protected — in a system that at once limited their horizons and safeguarded them from devastating consequences. The feminist historian Joan Jacobs Brumberg has written that “however prudish and ‘uptight’ the Victorians were, our ancestors had a deep commitment to girls.”

We, too, have a deep commitment to girls, and ours centers not on protecting their chastity, but on supporting their ability to compete with boys, to be free — perhaps for the first time in history — from the restraints that kept women from achieving on the same level. Now we have to ask ourselves this question: Does the full enfranchisement of girls depend on their being sexually liberated? And if it does, can we somehow change or diminish among the very young the trauma of pregnancy, the occasional result of even safe sex?

Biology is destiny, and the brutally unfair outcome that adolescent sexuality can produce will never change. Twenty years ago, I taught high school in a town near New Orleans. There was a girls’ bathroom next to my classroom, which was more convenient for me than the faculty one on the other side of campus. In the last stall, carved deeply into the metal box reserved for used sanitary napkins, was the single word “Please.”

Whoever had written it had taken a long time; the word was etched so deeply into the metal that she must have worked on it over several days, hiding in there on hall passes or study breaks, desperate. I never knew who wrote it, or when, but I always knew exactly what that anonymous girl meant. When I looked out over the girls moving through the hallways between classes, I wondered if she was among them, and I hoped that her prayer had been answered.

Caitlin Flanagan, the author of “To Hell With All That,” is working on a book about the emotional lives of pubescent girls.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/13/opini ... nted=print
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Babies born to teen dads face challenges

Canwest News Service


Thursday, February 07, 2008


Babies born to teenage fathers are more susceptible to a range of birth problems including prematurity, low birth weight and death within the first year of birth, according to an Ottawa study to be published today in the European fertility journal Human Reproduction.

On the other hand, fathers more than 40, and even more than 50, showed no elevated risk of the same problems.

"It's a novel finding," said Dr. Mark Walker, a high-risk obstetrician and a co-author of the study. "To be honest, I thought older men would have been the association rather than younger men."

The findings could lead to new standards in identifying high-risk pregnancies, Walker added. "For pregnancies conceived where the partner is young, it increases our awareness of complications that can occur, and may behoove us to increase our surveillance."

The joint study by the Ottawa Health Research Institute, the University of Ottawa and the Ottawa Hospital was unique in so closely examining the role of paternal age in the health of a pregnancy while tightly controlling the age of the mothers, said Dr. Shi Wu Wen, a perinatal epidemiologist and another of the study's authors.

In what the research team believes is the largest-ever study of its kind , more than 2.6 million U.S. birth records were examined involving women in their 20s with no childbearing history who gave birth between 1995 and 2000.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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One big 'sex talk' not enough: researchers

Reuters


Monday, March 03, 2008


Parents should consider having repeated discussions with their children about many aspects of sex, instead of one "big talk" on impersonal topics linked to sexuality such as puberty, researchers said Monday.

"Parents who take a checklist approach to broadening their sexual discussion with their children are unlikely to have as great an influence . . . as parents who introduce new sexual topics and then develop them through repeated discussions," said their report published in the journal Pediatrics.

The study, entitled Beyond the Big Talk, used written surveys given to 312 children in Southern California aged 11 to 15 to assess how frequent and candid their conversations were with their parents about sex.

The more parents talked with their children, the closer their relationships, wrote researchers Steven Martino and colleagues at the Rand Corporation.

The relationships also benefited when the discussions moved beyond "safe" or impersonal subjects such as puberty, reproduction and sexually transmitted diseases to more private topics such as masturbation and how sex feels.

The surveys looked at children's attitudes toward their parents over a one-year period and asked about how many of 22 sexual topics were discussed.

Mothers tended to discuss twice as many sexual topics with their children -- 12 -- as fathers did, the study said.

The report cited earlier studies that showed children who were communicated with were more likely to delay intercourse and, if they chose to have sex, to use contraception and have fewer partners.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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March 12, 2008
Sex Infections Found in Quarter of Teenage Girls
By LAWRENCE K. ALTMAN

The first national study of four common sexually transmitted diseases among girls and young women has found that one in four are infected with at least one of the diseases, federal health officials reported Tuesday.

Nearly half the African-Americans in the study of teenagers ages 14 to 19 were infected with at least one of the diseases monitored in the study — human papillomavirus (HPV), chlamydia, genital herpes and trichomoniasis, a common parasite.

The 50 percent figure compared with 20 percent of white teenagers, health officials and researchers said at a news conference at a scientific meeting in Chicago.

The two most common sexually transmitted diseases, or S.T.D.’s, among all the participants tested were HPV, at 18 percent, and chlamydia, at 4 percent, according to the analysis, part of the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey.

Each disease can be serious in its own way. HPV, for example, can cause cancer and genital warts.

Among the infected women, 15 percent had more than one of the diseases.

Women may be unaware they are infected. But the diseases, which are infections caused by bacteria, viruses and parasites, can produce acute symptoms like irritating vaginal discharge, painful pelvic inflammatory disease and potentially fatal ectopic pregnancy. The infections can also lead to longterm ailments like infertility and cervical cancer.

The survey tested for specific HPV strains linked to genital warts and cervical cancer.

Officials of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said the findings underscored the need to strengthen screening, vaccination and other prevention measures for the diseases, which are among the highest public health priorities.

About 19 million new sexually transmitted infections occur each year among all age groups in the United States.

“High S.T.D. infection rates among young women, particularly young African-American women, are clear signs that we must continue developing ways to reach those most at risk,” said Dr. John M. Douglas Jr., who directs the centers’ division of S.T.D. prevention.

The president of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America, Cecile Richards, said the new findings “emphasize the need for real comprehensive sex education.”

“The national policy of promoting abstinence-only programs is a $1.5 billion failure,” Ms. Richards said, “and teenage girls are paying the real price.”

Although earlier annual surveys have tested for a single sexually transmitted disease in a specified population, this is the first time the national study has collected data on all the most common sexual diseases in adolescent women at the same time. It is also the first time the study measured human papillomavirus.

Dr. Douglas said that because the new survey was based on direct testing, it was more reliable than analyses derived from data that doctors and clinics sent to the diseases center through state and local health departments.

“What we found is alarming,” said Dr. Sara Forhan, a researcher at the centers and the lead author of the study.

Dr. Forhan added that the study showed “how fast the S.T.D. prevalence appears.”

“Far too many young women are at risk for the serious health effects of untreated S.T.D.’s, ” she said.

The centers conducts the annual study, which asks a representative sample of the household population a wide range of health questions. The analysis was based on information collected in the 2003-4 survey.

Extrapolating from the findings, Dr. Forhan said 3.2 million teenage women were infected with at least one of the four diseases.

The 838 participants in the study were chosen at random with standard statistical techniques. Of the women asked, 96 percent agreed to submit vaginal swabs for testing.

The findings and specific treatment recommendations were available to the participants calling a password-protected telephone line. Three reminders were sent to participants who did not call.

Health officials recommend treatment for all sex partners of individuals diagnosed with curable sexually transmitted diseases. One promising approach to reach that goal is for doctors who treat infected women to provide or prescribe the same treatment for their partners, Dr. Douglas said. The goal is to encourage men who may not have a physician or who have no symptoms and may be reluctant to seek care to be treated without a doctor’s visit.

He also urged infected women to be retested three months after treatment to detect possible reinfection and to treat it.

Dr. Forhan said she did not know how many participants received their test results.

Federal health officials recommend annual screening tests to detect chlamydia for sexually active women younger than 25. The disease agency also recommends that women ages 11 to 26 be fully vaccinated against HPV.

The Food and Drug Administration has said in a report that latex condoms are “highly effective” at preventing infection by chlamydia, trichomoniasis, H.I.V., gonorrhea and hepatitis B.

The agency noted that condoms seemed less effective against genital herpes and syphilis. Protection against human papillomavirus “is partial at best,” the report said.
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Post by kmaherali »

March 17, 2008
Editorial
One in Four Girls

Teenage girls and their parents need to read the latest government study of sexually transmitted diseases. The infections are so prevalent they are hard to avoid once a girl becomes sexually active. One in four girls ages 14 to 19 is infected with at least one of four common diseases. Among African-American girls in the study, almost half were infected.

The data, drawn from a sample of 838 girls who participated in a broad national survey in 2003-4, was presented last week by researchers from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. By far the most common of the four S.T.D.’s was the human papillomavirus, or HPV, which infected 18 percent of the girls. Chlamydia infected 4 percent, trichomoniasis — a common parasite — 2.5 percent, and genital herpes 2 percent.

The study did not look at such feared diseases as H.I.V./AIDS, syphilis or gonorrhea, but the four it did look at are worrisome enough. Although most HPV infections cause no symptoms and clear the body in less than a year, persistent HPV can cause cervical cancer and genital warts. S.T.D.’s can cause infertility, pelvic inflammatory disease and other painful symptoms.

It will not be easy for sexually active teenagers to avoid any danger. Even among girls who said they had had only a single sexual partner, 20 percent were infected. With more than three million teenage girls infected, it is imperative to find ways to protect others.

The new findings strengthen the case for providing HPV vaccine to young girls and for regular screening of sexually active girls to detect infection. There is also a clear need to strengthen programs in sex education. Exhortations to practice abstinence go only so far.

Teenage girls who are sexually active need access to contraceptives and counseling. They need to understand that the numbers are against them and that a serious infection is but a careless sexual encounter away.
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Post by kmaherali »

Shield kids from sexual deviance: Pope
Pontiff says media, church, parents all have roles to play

Sheldon Alberts
Canwest News Service


Thursday, April 17, 2008


Pope Benedict on Wednesday upbraided Roman Catholic bishops in the United States for sometimes handling the church's sex abuse scandal "very badly," while telling Americans they must do more to protect children from the "crude manipulation of sexuality" now prevalent in the country.

In a speech Wednesday evening to Catholic bishops in Washington, the pontiff for the second day condemned the "gravely immoral behaviour" of U.S. priests whose abuse of children has cost the church more than $2 billion in settlements and scarred its reputation.

But he also appealed for Roman Catholic leaders in the U.S. to redouble efforts to open the "minds and hearts to moral truth" by vigorously promoting marriage and family life.

"It is your God-given responsibility as pastors to bind up the wounds caused by every breach of trust, to foster healing, to promote reconciliation and to reach out with loving concern to those so seriously wronged," he said in his speech at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception.

It was important to rebuild the trust of Americans, the Pope said, because Catholic bishops have a vital role to play in educating children on "proper" sexuality and urging secular society to do so as well.

He said parents, teachers, the media and the entertainment industry must also take more responsibility to shield American children from sexual deviance.

"What does it mean to speak of child protection when pornography and violence can be viewed in so many homes?" he asked.

"Children deserve to grow up with a healthy understanding of sexuality and its proper place in human relationships . . . They should be spared the degrading manifestations and the crude manipulations of sexuality so prevalent today."

Benedict's sober remarks came at the end of his first full day in the U.S., and followed a more celebratory meeting at the White House with U.S. President George W. Bush.

The pontiff and the president prayed together for the institution of the family during a 45-minute private meeting at the White House, a Vatican spokesman said.

During public remarks before an estimated 10,000 people on the White House lawn, Benedict also urged the United States to recommit to "patient efforts of international diplomacy."

The pontiff made no direct mention of his personal opposition to the Iraq war, an area of disagreement with Bush.

Instead, he used his meeting with the president to gently prod the president to more enthusiastically embrace multilateralism.

"On this, the 60th anniversary of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, the need for global solidarity is as urgent as ever," he said.

Bush, in his own remarks welcoming Benedict to the U.S., urged Americans to follow the example of faith and conservative morality set by the Pope.

The president complained about the "dictatorship" of moral relativism in liberal society and said he hoped the pontiff's presence would remind Americans about the sanctity of human life.

"In a world where some treat life as something to be debased and discarded, we need your message that all human life is sacred," the president said.

His comment appeared to be a reference to the Catholic church's opposition to abortion, one of the issues on which Bush and Benedict firmly agree.


© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Catholic schools wary of vaccine
Cancer-fighting shot stirs sex controversy

Michelle Lang
Calgary Herald


Saturday, June 14, 2008

CREDIT: Herald Archive, Reuters
Some Alberta school districts are opposed to a provincial HPV inoculation program for Grade 5 girls.

Some Alberta school districts and church leaders are opposed to vaccinating Catholic schoolgirls against a sexually-transmitted virus that causes cervical cancer, fearing it will promote premarital sex.

As the Alberta government prepares to inoculate Grade 5 girls against human papilloma virus beginning in September, an official with the Catholic Archdiocese of Edmonton argues Catholic schools should not participate in the program.

Meanwhile, at least one Catholic school district -- the Holy Spirit Catholic School Division in Lethbridge -- said Friday it will debate whether to allow the HPV vaccinations in its schools.

The Alberta government announced the voluntary program this week, saying the vaccine can prevent 70 per cent of cervical cancers by targeting four strains of HPV.

"While I believe the program is well intended, it may prove to be counterproductive," said Paul Quist, director of marriage and family life with the Edmonton archdiocese.

"It's a tacit approval of premature, premarital sex. . . . I think for the religious reasons that Catholic schools ought not to participate in this."

Alberta Health officials said they did not consult with Catholic leaders before announcing the vaccine would be delivered in schools, but argued the program is an important public health issue.

"This is a health decision. It's about saving lives," said Howard May, a spokesman with Alberta Health.

Cervical cancer kills 40 Alberta women every year.

The debate comes as several Ontario Catholic school boards consider whether to participate in that province's HPV vaccination program. Earlier this month, the Halton District Catholic School Board voted against allowing public health nurses into their schools to give Grade 8 girls the vaccine.

The Alberta government announced Thursday it would offer the HPV vaccine to Grade 5 girls beginning in September, while extending the program to Grade 9 girls between 2009 and 2012.

The province said the program will be delivered in schools.

Alberta Health's May said the program is voluntary and parents will be asked for their consent before students receive a vaccine.

In Lethbridge, the local Catholic school division said it was concerned about the announcement and would have to speak with church leaders about whether to allow the program at its schools.

"We believe in education that pursues an understanding of chastity," said David Keohane, superintendent at the Holy Spirit Catholic School Division, which has 4,300 students. "If they live a life faithful to that, they don't need to be pursuing an HPV vaccine."

But other districts, like Edmonton Catholic Schools, support the program.

"We will treat it like any other vaccine," said spokeswoman Lori Nagy.

Calgary Catholic School District representatives said administration has not discussed the issue with church leaders.

While some are raising concerns about the program, the Alberta Medical Association said Friday the vaccine is safe and effective and applauded the province for introducing the program.

"We need to focus once again on the health of children and women," said Dr. Darryl LaBuick, president of the association. "Cervical cancer doesn't discriminate on the basis of religion."

Meanwhile, at least one other Alberta religious group is endorsing the vaccine. The Muslim Council of Calgary said the program is preventative medicine.

"We're in favour of anything that reduces the risk of a slow and painful death," said David Liepert, a spokesman for the council.

"The vaccine doesn't stop us from teaching our children what's right and wrong."

mlang@theherald.canwest.com

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Post by kmaherali »

Motherhood a much better option than abortion

Selina Renfrow
For The Calgary Herald

Monday, July 07, 2008

I knew better. I knew better than to have sex without protection. I could have taken that condom out of my pocket and used it.

But I didn't.

At the age of 20 I was pregnant, single and living at home. It took me two months to decide what I was going to do; two months to choose a path for my life.

I chose to be a mother.

Abortion was an option I never considered.

Yes, my Catholic upbringing had an influence on my beliefs. Yes, my parents had an influence, too. But what I believe is that a child is born at the moment of conception. Abortion, to me, is murder. I also believe in being responsible for my actions. I chose to have sex without using any form of birth control. I knew I was risking becoming pregnant or getting a sexually transmitted infection. I'll admit I was naive: I didn't think it would happen to me, but it did -- I was pregnant and I had to deal with it.

I considered adoption. I went to an adoption agency and I spoke with the social worker there. She told me giving up your child for adoption felt like your best friend in the whole world died. It was a huge, emotional roller-coaster that took time to heal from.

I considered motherhood. I've always wanted to be mom. I wanted to give birth to, and adopt, numerous children. These were the dreams of young girl who had no idea what it's like to be a parent.

I chose motherhood because I believe abortion is wrong and adoption too hard. I chose motherhood because I wanted to be a mom and knew I could be a mom, that it was my time. What if I gave up on my chance to be a mother now and I couldn't be a mom later? I didn't want to take that risk. I made my choice.

To hear that Dr. Henry Morgentaler is receiving the Order of Canada is upsetting. I don't particularly care about the order, but I do care that he's being recognized and honoured for his part in having Canada's abortion law overturned by the Supreme Court. To some, he's a hero for championing women's health care. But this confuses me. He made abortion more accessible for women, yes, but how does a quick solution to a much larger problem amount to being an advocate for women's health care?

One good thing about Dr. Morgentaler is that, every time he is in the headlines, the debate about abortion resumes in our newspapers. It has been 20 years since the historic Supreme Court decision. Since then, meaningful debate seems to have been squashed.

Those against abortion have had their voices silenced by many who believe the debate is not relevant. They label anti-abortionist and religious groups as anti-choice, which is not the same thing.

For those who believe in God, we believe that God gave us the freedom of choice. However, just because we have the ability to choose our own path does not mean it is OK to choose the wrong path.

Those who label themselves pro-choice say it's about a woman's right to choose what happens to her body. But a woman already made that choice when she decided to have sex. She can reduce the risk of an unwanted pregnancy by choosing a form of birth control. But no condom, patch or pill is 100 per cent effective.

Having sex can result in creating a child or contracting an STI or both. There are not many people in Canada who can claim ignorance to these facts. Schools, churches, doctors and, most importantly, parents have the responsibility to educate children on sexual health and reproduction.

What Dr. Morgentaler, abortionists and the Canadian government have said by allowing abortion is that it is OK to not want to live with the consequences of your actions, it is OK to be irresponsible. They will allow you an apparently easy way out so you can potentially make the same mistake again.

Education is the only way to prevent women and men from becoming parents unexpectedly.

We need to have a healthy respect for sex. It shouldn't be feared or shunned, nor should it mean nothing.

Twenty years after the Supreme Court struck down Canada's abortion law, we should be ready to move forward together.

Not having a law regarding abortion is not the solution to the problem of not living up to the responsibilities we have.

We are the only western country that does not have an abortion law, and that is not something to be proud of.

As for me, looking into the gorgeous face of my two-year-old daughter is.

Selina Renfrow is an editorial assistant at the Calgary Herald, a Mount Royal College journalism student and the proud mother of a two-year-old daughter.

© The Calgary Herald 2008

****
Men's age affects fertility
Older potential dads face greater difficulty: study

Matthew Coutts
Canwest News Service


Monday, July 07, 2008


TORONTO - The age of the potential father -- not just the mother -- can seriously limit the chances of having a baby later in life, according to a study released today.

While it has long been documented would-be mothers in their mid-30s, or older, face reduced pregnancy rates and increased miscarriages, researchers say this is the strongest proof to date that similar problems are caused by the age of the would-be father in couples that face difficulty conceiving.

Researchers at France's Eylau Centre for Assisted Reproduction monitored 21,239 cases of intrauterine inseminations, an effective type of artificial insemination, in more than 12,000 couples between 2002 and 2006.

They found maternal age was closely associated with a decrease in the pregnancy rate -- 8.9 per cent in women over 35 years, compared with 14.5 per cent in younger women -- as well as a higher miscarriage rate.

"But we also demonstrated that the age of the father was important in the rate of pregnancy, with a negative effect for men over 40," said Stephanie Belloc, lead author of the study. "And even more surprising, the proportion of miscarriages went up as well."

The study, to be presented at the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology conference in Barcelona, showed paternal age led to decreases in the pregnancy rate, from 12.3 per cent with fathers 30 years of age or younger, to 9.3 per cent in fathers older than 45 years of age. The rate of miscarriage more than doubled over the same periods, from 13.7 per cent to 32.4 per cent.

In most cases the couples were being treated at the clinic because the husband had infertility issues, but researchers say the findings relate to men without such problems. "There is no doubt that we can extrapolate from the study to men in general," said co-author Yves Menezo, also a researcher at the Eylau Centre.

Belloc said sperm with DNA damage, common in older men, was still able to enter the egg during IUI, but the weakened sperm could result in failure to conceive.

While previous reports show a decline in sperm count and quality in older men, this is the first clinical proof of a direct affect on fertility.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Abstinence, faithfulness better against AIDS than condoms

Susan Martinuk
For The Calgary Herald


Friday, July 11, 2008


The problem of Africa was a major theme of discussion at this week's G-8 summit in Japan. The solution -- as it inevitably is when political leaders decide to solve a problem -- was financial aid. They reaffirmed a previous commitment to spend $60 billion over the next five years to fight AIDS and other infectious diseases that are devastating the African continent.

According to the UN, G-8 AIDS funding reached a record-breaking $6.6 billion in 2007. The current projected figures will certainly surpass that sum to produce a new record for AIDS spending in Africa, yet it's still not enough for global AIDS leaders.

They say the commitment falls "short of expectations" and tossed out the figure of $173 billion as being more realistic (which it might be if AIDS was the world's only problem).

But even as the elites in the AIDS bureaucracy were demanding more, the potential aid recipients were likely cringing at the thought of billions more coming their way from the West -- because they know any aid will be tied to full acceptance of a western agenda to stem the tide of AIDS. They also know that agenda simply won't work in Africa (heck, it doesn't even work here).

A damning indictment of the West's attempts to save Africa from AIDS appeared in the June 30 issue of the Washington Post. The writer was Sam L. Ruteikara, co-chair of Uganda's National AIDS Prevention Committee, and he essentially told the American Senate (currently debating a $50-billion AIDS relief package for Africa) to butt out of Africa's AIDS problem and "let my people go."

He's not being ungrateful. He's being realistic in pointing out that the AIDS prevention strategies so eagerly supplied by the western experts (who also control the financial aid) have only served to increase HIV infections in his country.

Although Uganda sits in the heart of sub-Saharan Africa where tens of millions are infected and 76 per cent of the world's 2007 AIDS deaths occurred, it stands alone as a nation that has developed a successful home-grown strategy to combat AIDS.

From 1991 to 2002, the number of Ugandans infected with HIV dropped from 21 to six per cent. Between 1989 and 1995, the number of men having three or more sexual partners in a year dropped from 15 to three per cent.

By comparison, strategies in Canada have yet to demonstrate such success. It is estimated that there were anywhere from 1,800 to 3,200 new HIV infections in 1993; by 2005, those numbers had risen to 2,300 and 4,500.

So what's Uganda got that we don't have?

It's not complicated. Ugandan leaders simply recognized -- and acknowledged -- that the main reason for the spread of HIV was people having sex with more than one partner. So they urged people to be faithful. Their highly successful message was ABC (Abstain, Be faithful or use Condoms).

The condom message was preached -- but only as a last resort.

The dramatic drop in HIV infections in a high-risk country was heralded as the AIDS success story of the '90s, but it was virtually ignored by the West's AIDS power brokers, who were obviously confounded by the simplicity of the campaign (it cost just 29 cents per person per year) and, more importantly, offended by the notion that the message of sexual monogamy could trump condom use.

So they quickly took hold of the principle that "if everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something" and complained to the international community that Ugandans were "wrong to try to limit people's sexual freedom."

They then wielded the power of their AIDS support dollars to create a new, westernized strategy for prevention that ignored any mention of faithfulness/abstinence and focused instead on, you guessed it, the almighty condom.

The strategy also "altered" statistics to suggest that the HIV infection rate among married couples was 42 per cent instead of the 6.3 per cent determined by previous surveys.

When the statistic was questioned, the AIDS advisers who had assumed control of Uganda's AIDS prevention program refused to provide the source.

The result of this new strategy? Ugandan HIV rates went up.

Nicely done, international AIDS "experts." You managed to nip success in the bud by supplanting a successful and proven prevention strategy with one that exacerbates HIV infection rates.

For any who still question whether AIDS strategies for prevention and education are rooted more in ideology than science, the answer is clear.

Our western commitment to foster sexual freedom at any cost is clearly at odds with our stated goals of preventing HIV infection -- both here and in Africa.

Promoting monogamy reduces AIDS and costs pennies in comparison to the billions of dollars we invest in AIDS prevention strategies.

This money is needed for AIDS treatment and medicine, and we are tossing it to the wind by making our global battle against AIDS far more complicated and costly than it needs to be.

No wonder Ruteikara derides western aid. No wonder he writes: "We understand that casual sex is dear to you, but staying alive is dear to us. Listen to African wisdom, and we will show you how to prevent AIDS."

Susan Martinuk's column appears every Friday

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Post by kmaherali »

Porn channel an abomination

Fred Henry
For The Calgary Herald


Tuesday, August 26, 2008


The CRTC approved a Canadian pay-television pornography channel called Northern Peaks last week on the basis that 50 per cent of its pornographic content would be produced in Canada, which in turn, will also lead to the creation of a pornography industry in Canada.

In justifying its decision, the CRTC argues that it never takes a moral perspective on the contents of the applications it reviews. This explanation is not only ludicrous in itself but simply not credible because the CRTC has been noticeably reluctant over the years to license religious broadcasting.

Without question, pornography has a devastating impact upon all of society, especially women and young children. Pornography teaches that women enjoy "forced" or perverse sexual activity; advocates prostitution, exhibitionism and voyeurism as normal behaviour; and regards women as sex objects to be used for one's self-gratification.

For some men, the regular use of pornography normalizes aggression toward women in sexual and other interpersonal encounters, and increases the tolerance for such aggression against women in the larger culture.

Sadly, the greatest impact may be on the young, especially males 12 through 17 years of age, because pornography portrays sexual activity outside of marriage as acceptable without the dire consequences of AIDS or other venereal diseases, and without the responsibility toward conceiving a human life.

These assertions are supported by criminal evidence. A proven direct correlation exists between crimes of rape, child abuse, and the physical abuse of a spouse, and the proliferation of pornographic materials and the presence of live porn and sexually oriented businesses in a community.

Pornography is not simply linked to a "one time, one action" phenomenon, but may become like a spiritual cancer that corrupts the person.

Dr. Victor Cline has posited four progressive effects of pornography: (1) addiction, where the need to view pornographic materials leads to a loss of free control over behaviour; (2) escalation, where the person delves into progressively harder pornography, usually to attain the same level of sensation and arousal; (3) desensitization, whereby the user is no longer morally sensitive to the shocking, illegal, repulsive, perverted or immoral quality of the material, but instead views it as acceptable and begins to look upon others as objects; and (4) acting out, where the fantasizing becomes overt behaviour.

Additionally from a moral point of view, there are three reasons why pornography is wrong and sinful behaviour for individuals.

First, pornography offends the dignity of the participants (actors, vendors, the public). Each one is exploited himself or exploits others in some way for personal pleasure or gain. In all cases, the dignity of the human being -- whether the person posing, the person producing, the person distributing, or the person enjoying -- is debased.

Second, those who engage in pornography immerse themselves in a fantasy world, withdrawing from reality. While genuine love always involves a self-giving of oneself for the good of others, pornography entices a person to withdraw into a selfish world of perverted fantasy which may later be acted out to the detriment of oneself and others. This problem has increased dramatically, since the Internet offers "virtual reality" sexual interaction.

Third, pornography offends against the virtue of chastity and constitutes an assault on marriage. Each of us must respect the sanctity of our own human sexuality, which involves the integration of his physical and spiritual being. Furthermore, conjugal love which reflects the union of husband and wife, and the enactment of their vows is sacred. The conjugal act ought to express that faithful, permanent, exclusive, self-giving and life-giving love between husband and wife.

Economic values that are important today must include the enhancement of people, not their exploitation and debasement.

In making its decision on Northern Peaks, the CRTC specified that the channel would only be given its formal licence if at least one cable or satellite provider agrees to add the channel to its service list. The channel has three years to obtain such a contract or else the licence will expire.

Consider writing to your own cable provider (name and address available on your monthly bill) and advise it that if it includes this pornographic channel on its service list, you will immediately switch providers. If the cable provider believes that doing so will harm business -- the company will refuse the pornography channel.

In addition, write to the CRTC, Ottawa, Ont. K1A 0N2, Fax: 819-994-0218, raising your objections to its approval of this channel -- Canadian content or not.

Fred Henry is the Catholic bishop of Calgary.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Post by kmaherali »

Don't just do it
Teaching abstinence in schools is starting to pay off

Calgary Herald


Wednesday, August 27, 2008


A StatsCan study showing fewer Alberta teens are having sex than they were a decade ago appears to show that including abstinence in school sex education courses works. The study revealed that among teens between the ages of 15 and 19, the percentage who report they've had intercourse at least once was 39 per cent in 2005, down from 44 per cent in 1996 to 1997. StatsCan says that girls are responsible for the lower figures -- from 51 per cent down to 43 per cent in the same time period -- which also suggests a quiet revolution is being fomented in the way girls' values and images of themselves are changing.

Abstinence has been part of the Alberta sex ed curriculum for a number of years, and is an essential component of any sex education program. Focusing exclusively on the clinical aspects of sex, threatening kids with gruesome diseases -- as was done 30 years ago -- or dwelling overlong on the mechanics of, for example, putting on a condom, do not give kids a context in which to place their sexual relationships. The message in the lesson of pure mechanics is that sex is an entity unto itself, divorced from the realm of feelings and self-

respect, and reduced to the level of purely a physical function. Kids need to be taught that sex is something intricately bound up with love, caring, commitment and mutual respect. Instead, for decades, school sex ed classes tended to focus on the clinical aspects of sex.

The emphasis in those classes was on safe sex, but that really meant safe for physical health, in terms of sexually transmitted disease and preventing pregnancy. Teaching abstinence goes further, because it is about what is safe for the mind, the self-esteem and the heart.

The pendulum is swinging back in other ways, too, as Wendy Shalit documented in her book, Girls Gone Mild. She reported that teen girls who are sexually active are much more likely to bully and be bullied, suffer from depression and low self-esteem, and engage in self-injurious activities, including attempting suicide. Shalit noted that girls themselves are in the vanguard of change, whether it's insisting on dressing more modestly or abstaining from sex -- and much of this has happened, not just because of peer pressure, but in response to pressure from adults to be more sexualized at an earlier age.

Children themselves are saying "enough!" and the adults need to listen. Teens want and need the adults in their lives to set boundaries, to establish rules and guidelines for behaviour. Teaching abstinence in sex ed classes is one of the most important ways this need can be met -- and the efforts have begun to bear fruit.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Honour before hot sex, men reveal in survey
Stereotypes debunked, say authors

Tom Spears
Canwest News Service


Thursday, August 28, 2008


The male ideal of a "man's man" is a guy who's responsible, honourable and a devoted partner, not one who's always on the prowl for sex or driven by his career, an international study says.

The finding cuts across age groups and cultures from Germany to Brazil, Italy to the United States, says the Canadian-led research team. And they conclude it's time to dump the stereotype of masculinity as shallow, me-first womanizers, say the authors.

To understand men, "we should pay attention and ask, rather than presume we know," said one of the research team, Julia Heiman of the Kinsey Institute in Bloomington, Ind.

The survey of 27,839 men in eight countries found that being seen as "honourable" was their highest ideal (picked by 33 per cent), followed closely by being in control of their lives (28 per cent). Most claimed to want love ahead of sex.

At the bottom of the scale, only one per cent rated a great sex life as the top male quality, while three per cent chose financial success.

Views of maleness bog down in stereotypes, said the team's leader, Canadian Michael Sand.

"Men routinely said that being in good health, having a good family life, having a harmonious relationship with my wife or my partner, is way more important than . . . a successful career, having a nice home, having a satisfying sex life."

"Being seen as honourable -- I think men are telling us that how my community views my integrity and my values system is important to me."

They're also saying "I want to be seen as a good father, a successful partner, far more than I want to be seen as a stud," he said. "All of these things point to the importance -- not in keeping with stereotypes -- of interpersonal relationships to men, as well as to women of course."

His team's work began several years ago when Bayer Schering Pharma wanted to design an erectile dysfunction drug. (Sand worked for Bayer, but now works for another drug company and for the New England Research Institutes.)

But to build a drug, the company wanted to understand men better: "their overall health, their well-being, their quality of life, their 'constructs' of masculinity, as well as their sexual function." That led to the broad survey, whose findings conflict with pop culture.

In beer commercials, sitcoms and Hollywood gossip sheets, men are eternally chasing babes, fleeing commitment, abandoning their kids and having trouble staying sober.

Even the health-care profession can get stuck with these ideas, Sand notes.

But can we trust the survey's claims?

"When you're talking about nearly 28,000 men, the chance that they all conspired to mislead us in the same direction is pretty low."

And he says people aren't really surprised by his results, once they think about people they know.

"Just as we know all women are not Playboy bunnies, we know all men are not ravening sex fiends interested in the next conquest. These stereotypes -- I think we all know they're not real.

"This is why it's so important to do research -- to challenge our assumptions."

Other team members came from the University of Western Ontario and the Kinsey Institute.

The study is published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
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Post by kmaherali »

September 6, 2008
Op-Ed Columnist
Let’s Talk About Sex
By CHARLES M. BLOW

Sarah Palin has a pregnant teenager. And, she’s not alone. According to a report published in 2007, there are more than 400,000 other American girls in the same predicament.

In fact, a 2001 Unicef report said that the United States teenage birthrate was higher than any other member of the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development. The U.S. tied Hungary for the most abortions. This was in spite of the fact that girls in the U.S. were not the most sexually active. Denmark held that title. But, its teenage birthrate was one-sixth of ours, and its teenage abortion rate was half of ours.

If there is a shame here, it’s a national shame — a failure of our puritanical society to accept and deal with the facts. Teenagers have sex. How often and how safely depends on how much knowledge and support they have. Crossing our fingers that they won’t cross the line is not an intelligent strategy.

To wit, our ridiculous experiment in abstinence-only education seems to be winding down with a study finding that it didn’t work. States are opting out of it. Parents don’t like it either. According to a 2004 survey sponsored by NPR, the Kaiser Family Foundation and Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government, 65 percent of parents of high school students said that federal money “should be used to fund more comprehensive sex education programs that include information on how to obtain and use condoms and other contraceptives.”

We need to take some bold steps beyond the borders of our moralizing and discomfort and create a sex education infrastructure that actually acknowledges reality and protects our children from unwanted pregnancies, or worse.

Britain is already taking these steps. London’s Daily Telegraph reported last month on a June study that found that “one in three secondary schools in England now has a sexual health clinic to give condoms, pregnancy tests and even morning-after pills to children as young as 11.”

Furthermore, a bipartisan group from the British Parliament is seeking to make sex education compulsory for “children as young as four years old.” In a letter to the paper, the group laid out its case: “International evidence suggests that high-quality sex and relationship education that puts sex in its proper context, that starts early enough to make a difference and that gives youngsters the confidence and ability to make well-informed decisions helps young people delay their first sexual experience and leads to lower teenage pregnancy levels.”

That may be extreme, but many Americans can’t even talk about sex without giggling, squirming or blushing. Let’s start there. Talk to your kids about sex tonight, with confidence and a straight face. “I’d prefer you waited to have sex. That said, whenever you choose to do it, make sure you use one of these condoms.” It works.

E-mail: chblow@nytimes.com.

****
Cancer vaccine ready for girls
Controversial medicine helps prevent cervical cancer

Michelle Lang
Calgary Herald; With files from Canwest News Service


Saturday, September 06, 2008


Alberta is forging ahead with a program to immunize schoolgirls against the virus that causes cervical cancer, despite controversy among religious leaders about the plan and a recent study linking the vaccine with allergic reactions.

The province's acting chief medical officer of health said this week that health regions are preparing the human papillomavirus (HPV) vaccine program for Grade 5 girls, which will begin later this month or in early October.

"It's a vaccine that can prevent cancer, and right now, we still see women dying of cervical cancer," said Dr. Gerry Predy in an interview.

"In the longer term, we hope that by rolling out the vaccine, we can essentially eliminate cancer of the cervix." Alberta is one of several provinces that have introduced inoculation programs with a vaccine that protects against four strains of HPV, which experts say cause about 70 per cent of cervical cancers.

Although the program is proceeding, Alberta Health officials are reviewing a study, released this month, that suggests the vaccine carries a higher-than-expected risk of a severe allergic reaction called anaphylaxis.

The Australian study of 114,000 girls and women found an estimated rate of anaphylaxis of 2.6 per 100,000 doses of the HPV vaccine. That is five to 20 times higher than rates reported for other vaccines, which typically carry some risk of allergic reaction.

But experts have said the risk of any serious side-effects from the vaccine is very low. The Public Health Agency of Canada released a statement in response to the study saying the shots are "safe and effective." "This report should not deter girls and women from receiving HPV immunization," said the agency's statement.

Predy said Alberta Health is examining results from the study.

The risk of allergic reaction is just the latest controversy surrounding the HPV vaccine.

Catholic schools in the province have debated whether to participate in the program, with some questioning if it would be appropriate, given the church's position on premarital sex. The virus is largely transmitted through sexual activity.

Most Catholic school districts are expected to make a decision on the matter in mid-September, according to the Alberta Catholic School Trustees Association.

Officials in Calgary and Edmonton have already indicated they will allow the vaccination program to go ahead on school property.

Meanwhile, at least two school districts that had concerns about the vaccine -- the Red Deer Catholic Regional Division and Lethbridge-based Holy Spirit Catholic School Division -- have decided to participate.

Christine Moore, chairwoman of the Red Deer board, said the district wrestled with its decision because a school-based program "may incorrectly send a message that early sexual activity is acceptable." "It was a difficult one for the board, but we look at it as a health issue," she said. "We followed the advice of our bishops, that parents are the primary decision-makers." The Alberta HPV program is voluntary and requires parental consent.

In Calgary, health officials said they are still working out when they will begin the vaccination program.

The shots will be administered at the same time the students receive hepatitis B shots.

"Work has begun to start planning the process to deliver the vaccine to Grade 5 students," said Don Stewart, a spokesman for the Calgary Health Region, which will work with local school districts to deliver the vaccine.

"It will roll out sometime this fall."

mlang@theherald.canwest.com

© The Calgary Herald 2008
kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

Catholic students won't get cancer vaccine
Board will follow bishop's lead on 'moral issue'

Sarah McGinnis, with files from Sherri zickefoose, Calgary Herald and The Edmonton Journal
Calgary Herald


Thursday, September 25, 2008


Calgary Catholic trustees have decided on moral grounds not to offer a vaccine against the virus that causes cervical cancer.

Health regions are preparing the human papillomavirus (HPV) vaccine program for Grade 5 girls, which will begin later this month or early October.

The voluntary program has generated considerable debate in Alberta's Catholic school boards. Some have questioned whether it is appropriate to inoculate against a virus largely transmitted through sexual activity given the church's opposition to premarital sex.

On Wednesday night, Calgary's Catholic school trustees voted 6-1 to inform principals the district would not be making the vaccine available in schools.

Instead, trustees decided to provide an information package to parents on where the vaccine will be offered in the city so they can decide whether to get the shot for their child.

"This is a moral issue and a spiritual issue and not an educational one," trustee Mary Martin said in a brief statement.

She cited the need to comply with the wishes of Bishop Fred Henry as Calgary's Catholic spiritual leader.

"The bishop felt it was a moral issue and it might make

. . . Catholic schools appear to be condoning premarital sex," said trustee Marge Belcourt.

The school board continues to prioritize the rights of parents to be primary educators in such matters.

Schools will be sending parents an information package complete with a letter from the bishop on the issue and resources from Alberta Health and Wellness on the vaccine as well as where parents can get it for their child free if it's not provided at schools, said Belcourt.

That way if parents feel it is a health issue and not a moral issue they can make the decision which is best for their child, Belcourt said.

News of the board's stance on the issue is cause for worry for one Calgary gynecologist.

"I am very surprised. They are putting these girls at risk. They're no doubt, guaranteed, that if these girls are not immunized that some of them in the future are going to become infected with HPV. The statistics are there. It's going to happen to Catholic girls and non-Catholic girls," said Dr. Brian Hauck.

"They're putting their students at risk for disease and themselves at risk for blame for this. Other provinces are providing this and that is the standard of care. If they don't provide it, that's inadequate," he said.

"It defies reasonable common sense. They're the ostrich putting their head in the sand."

The vote on the controversial issue wasn't unanimous as trustee Michael Annuik was against the plan.

The Alberta government announced the voluntary program in June, saying the vaccine can prevent 70 per cent of cervical cancers by targeting four strains of HPV.

The Catholic board's decision does not sound alarm bells for the health minister, a spokesman says.

"Alberta Health and Wellness is going to be working with Alberta Health Services to develop options to provide the vaccine to eligible girls who may be unable to receive it through a school program," said Alberta Health spokesman Howard May.

Cervical cancer kills 40 Alberta women every year.

Most Catholic school districts are expected to make a decision on the matter in mid-September, according to the Alberta Catholic School Trustees Association.

A Catholic school board in south-central Alberta has also opted not to offer the vaccine to Grade 5 girls.

"The board would like to emphasize that this decision was made following thorough research into both sides of this debate from a moral and a health perspective," states a press release posted Wednesday on the website of the St. Thomas Aquinas Roman Catholic School Division, which represents more than 2,000 students in the Ponoka, Beaumont, Leduc and Drayton Valley areas.

On Friday, representatives from all 23 Catholic school boards in Alberta and Yellowknife met to discuss the issue that has fired up people in the Catholic community.

Some believe that giving the vaccine to girls tacitly condones premarital sex, said Ted Paszek, president of the Alberta Catholic School Trustees Association.

He said his association did not tell school districts how to proceed with the school-based vaccination program being rolled out by the Alberta government.

He said that, ultimately, parents must decide whether or not their daughters should be vaccinated, but added that the role of Catholic schools is to teach the tenets of the church, including that sex should be limited to marriage.

smcginnis@theherald.canwest.com

© The Calgary Herald 2008
kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

Vaccinations don't cause immorality

Calgary Herald

Monday, September 29, 2008

The human papilloma virus does not choose its victims based on their morals -- and the Calgary Catholic School Division was wrong to turn thumbs down on permitting Grade 5 girls to be vaccinated against it.

That said, the board is to be commended for mitigating its decision by agreeing to send information packets to parents, advising them where they can get their daughters inoculated for free.

Bishop Fred Henry believes permitting Catholic schoolgirls to receive the Gardasil vaccine is in effect condoning premarital sex. However, this is an issue of public health, not of morality.

A study done last year by Merck, the manufacturer of Gardasil, showed that besides protecting against four types of HPV responsible for 90 per cent of cervical cancer and genital warts, Gardasil is 38 per cent effective against 10 other strains of HPV, which are responsible for 20 per cent of those cancers.

That morality has absolutely nothing to do with it is borne out by the fact that women who remain chaste until marriage can still be infected by HPV if their husbands picked it up from previous sex partners. Likewise, women who are the victims of a sexual assault can contract the virus.

According to Canadian Family Physician, the official journal of The College of Family Physicians of Canada, cervical cancer is the second most common cancer among Canadian women. CFP likens mass vaccination against HPV with other types of mass inoculation campaigns, such as those against polio and mumps. CFP also speculates on the possibility of vaccinating boys, given the fact HPV can cause a certain type of cancer in men.

Gardasil is not yet available for vaccination of males, but if it were, would it still be a morality issue for Henry and the trustees, or would they accept male vaccination for what it is -- a way of protecting both men and their sex partners?

Having a vaccination affects no one's morals. Human beings are far more complex than that. An injection of antibodies does not equate to an infusion of immorality. The values that are instilled in the home, the church and at Catholic school remain unaffected by a brief encounter with a hypodermic needle.

Henry should also be aware that many teens -- whether Catholic or not -- are going to be sexually active anyway. Withholding the vaccine, then, appears to suggest these girls deserve the "punishment" of cancer.

Diseases should never be politicized or slotted into moral pigeonholes; nor does cancer discriminate among its victims. Girls have as much right to be protected from HPV as they do from polio, mumps or any disease for which there is a vaccine. To deny that protection on moral grounds is short-sighted.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
Mehreen1221
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Post by Mehreen1221 »

Kmaherali, maybe, as of right now, Ismailia and generally Islamic faith is not sanctioning same sex marriage but how can someone say that it will never do that as well in the future? I mean the world/universe is constantly changing and so is the practice of the faith (Tariqah). I mean so many amendments in the practice of the faith since the very beginning and in last 1400 years, and one of the foundations of Ismaili Tariqah is the “Changes” in the practice of the faith according to the time and environment. I can understand that the core faith can be never changed, like the principle of Unity of Almighty God and the basic principles of Ismaili Imamat and so forth, but is a person’s “marriage” to another human (regardless of sexual orientation) a religious and spiritual matter in the eyes of the ismailia faith? I think it is just a worldly and social issue of human society and I do agree that in Islam Din and Duniya are not separated and Islam is a “Way of Life” not just a religion or spirituality. But is there a possibility of amendments according to the time and situation in this regard in the faith of Islam? Also the Marriage can also have different legal and social definitions and settings (more than just someone’s genitalia entering another’s without social any social taboo but not less than that either) LOL…
What do you think about that possibility?
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Post by kmaherali »

Sex a lot of hassle,' says 105-year-old virgin

AGENCE FRANCE-PRESSE LONDON

A British woman who celebrated her 105th birthday this week said the secret to long life was celibacy, adding she imagined sex was a "lot of hassle."

Clara Meadmore, who marked her birthday with a drop of wine at the Perran Bay nursing home in Cornwall, southwest England, also received a card from Queen Elizabeth.

"People have asked me whether I am a homosexual and the answer is no," Meadmore said. "I have just never been interested in sex.

"I imagine there is a lot of hassle involved and I have always been busy doing other things."

Born in Glasgow, Scotland, in 1903, Meadmore lived in Canada and New Zealand as a child before returning to Britain in her 20s to work as a secretary and housekeeper.

She served with the army in Egypt during the Second World War, and the lived in London and New Zealand before retiring 40 years ago in Cornwall

Calgary Herald
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Post by kmaherali »

Chinese youths conflicted about sex, survey finds

Reuters


Friday, October 17, 2008


A new survey of China's first generation born under the one-child policy has found they are more open but still conflicted about sex, and don't approve of one-night stands, a state newspaper said on Wednesday.

With the world's biggest population straining scarce land, water and energy, China has enforced rules limiting family size since the 1970s, generally limiting couples to having just one child, though there are exceptions.

The survey, carried out by the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences on people born between 1976 and 1986, found their average age for first sexual experience was 22.8 years, the China Youth Daily said.

But more than 96 per cent of the surveyed first had sex with their partner, rather than just a one-night stand. Nearly 20 per cent first had sex before the age of 20.

"The survey found that on the one hand they had sex earlier, but on the other it was in a stable relationship," the newspaper said. "This shows the contradictions felt in the first generation of single children towards sex."

Most did not approve of one-night stands, and almost three-quarters said they would never try homosexuality, the report added.

© The Calgary Herald 2008
Mehreen1221
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Post by Mehreen1221 »

Except Japan, no matter how much industrialized and economically advanced Asia becomes, culturally, for the masses of the world, it will still be considered marginalized against western cultural values and cannot stand a chance. unfortunately, they have to be succumbed in order to be even noticed on world stage. like in India, the American cultural and commercial Dragons have englufed the whole indian society to the point that it blows one's mind and sounds like an organized conspiracy from all fronts including media, showbiz, arts, commerce and consumerisim agaist Indian Identity itself...all out reflections and promotion of American lifestyle thru movies and TV media and consequently recent widespread threats of HIV/AIDS in India are few of the examples.
kmaherali
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Post by kmaherali »

In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate

"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"

Resisting Sexual Desires


Sexual desire is something that has been created in man and it cannot be got rid of. Getting rid of it is not something that is required of the Muslim; rather what is required of him is to refrain from using it in haraam ways, and to use it in the ways that Allaah has permitted.

The problem of desire in a young people may be solved by taking two steps.

The first step is to reduce and weaken the things that may provoke desire in a person. This may be achieved in a number of ways, including the following:

1 – Lowering the gaze and refraining from looking at that which Allaah has forbidden. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts)”

[al-Noor 24:31]

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do not follow one glance with another, for the first is allowed but not the second.”

There are many sources of haraam looking, such as looking directly at young men and thinking about their attractive looks, or looking at pictures in magazines and movies.

2 – Avoiding reading stories and novels which focus on the sexual aspect, and avoiding reading internet websites which deal with such topics.

3 – Keeping away from bad company.

4 – Avoiding thinking about desire as much as possible. Thinking in and of itself is not haraam, but if one thinks about it for too long, that may lead a person to haraam actions.

5 – Spending one's time in useful pursuits, because spare time may lead one to fall into haraam things.

6 – Avoiding as much as possible going to public places where young men and women mix.

7 – If a girl/boy is tested with studying in a mixed environment, and cannot find any alternative, she has to remain modest, serious and dignified, and should avoid sitting with young men and speaking to them as much as possible. She should restrict her relationships to friendships with righteous female classmates.

The second step is:

To strengthen the factors that will prevent one acting in accordance with one’s desires. This is achieved in a number of ways, including the following:

1 – Strengthening the faith in one’s heart and strengthening one’s relationship with Allaah. This may be achieved by remembering Allaah a great deal, reading Quraan, thinking of the names and attributes of Allaah, and doing a lot of naafil prayers. Belief strengthens the heart and soul, and it helps one to resist temptation.

2 – Fasting, as taught by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) when he said: “O young men, whoever among you can afford to, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and in guarding one’s chastity. Whoever cannot afford it, then let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.”

This is addressed to young men, but it also includes young women.

3 – Strengthening one’s resolve and willpower, for this will make a young woman able to resist and control her desires.

4 – Remembering what Allaah has prepared for righteous young women. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Verily, the Muslims (those who submit to Allaah in Islam) men and women, the believers men and women (who believe in Islamic Monotheism), the men and the women who are obedient (to Allaah), the men and women who are truthful (in their speech and deeds), the men and the women who are patient (in performing all the duties which Allaah has ordered and in abstaining from all that Allaah has forbidden), the men and the women who are humble (before their Lord Allaah), the men and the women who give Sadaqaat (i.e. Zakaah and alms), the men and the women who observe Sawm (fast) (the obligatory fasting during the month of Ramadaan, and the optional Nawafil fasting), the men and the women who guard their chastity (from illegal sexual acts) and the men and the women who remember Allaah much with their hearts and tongues. Allaah has prepared for them forgiveness and a great reward (i.e. Paradise)”

[al-Ahzaab 33:35]

5 – Thinking about the lives of righteous women who guarded their chastity, such as Maryam, whom Allaah praises in the Qur’aan (interpretation of the meaning):

“And Maryam (Mary), the daughter of ‘Imraan who guarded her chastity. And We breathed into (the sleeve of her shirt or her garment) through Our Rooh [i.e. Jibreel (Gabriel)], and she testified to the truth of the Words of her Lord [i.e. believed in the Words of Allaah: “Be!” and he was; that is ‘Eesa (Jesus), son of Maryam (Mary) as a Messenger of Allaah], and (also believed in) His Scriptures, and she was of the Qaanitoon (i.e. obedient to Allaah)”
[al-Tahreem 66:12]

And thinking about the immoral, fallen women, and comparing between the two types, for there is a huge difference between them.

6 – Choosing righteous companions and spending time with them, so that they can help one another to obey and worship Allaah.

7 – Comparing the effects of immediate fulfillment of desire when a girl responds to haraam, which is followed by loss of pleasure and all that is left is regret and sorrow, with patience and striving against one’s whims and desires, and realizing that the pleasure of conquering one’s whim and desires is far greater than the pleasures of enjoying haraam things.

8 – Seeking help by calling upon Allaah and asking Him for help. The Qur’aan tells us the lesson to be learned from the story of Yoosuf (peace be upon him):

“He said: ‘O my Lord! Prison is dearer to me than that to which they invite me. Unless You turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them and be one (of those who commit sin and deserve blame or those who do deeds) of the ignorant’

So his Lord answered his invocation and turned away from him their plot. Verily, He is the All‑Hearer, the All‑Knower”

[Yoosuf 12:33 – interpretation of the meaning]

Courtesy: Shaykh Muhammad al-Duwaysh

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/20161/sorrow



Permission is granted to circulate among private individuals and groups, to post on Internet sites and to publish in full text and subject title in not-for-profit publications.

When Allah and His Messenger have decided something it is not for any man or woman of the believers to have a choice about it. Anyone who disobeys Allah and His Messenger is clearly misguided. (33:36)
Mehreen1221
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Post by Mehreen1221 »

haram this, haram that...can't remmember all that. just as long as larki & larka raazi, tou kiya karey ga qazi...just have sex as much as you want and who or what you want with. it's all cool as long as it is mutually consensual...or else it might be hurtful & criminal and might take you to the prison. Period.

beside that, the above posted novel is from a site which is a disguise and just a personal interpretation of the holy scriptures of Islam by some mullah, gotta lynch him....anyone can make up things like that...and will someone give a rat's ass?
ShamsB
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Post by ShamsB »

Mehreen1221 wrote:haram this, haram that...can't remmember all that. just as long as larki & larka raazi, tou kiya karey ga qazi...just have sex as much as you want and who or what you want with. it's all cool as long as it is mutually consensual...or else it might be hurtful & criminal and might take you to the prison. Period.

beside that, the above posted novel is from a site which is a disguise and just a personal interpretation of the holy scriptures of Islam by some mullah, gotta lynch him....anyone can make up things like that...and will someone give a rat's ass?
how about animals and dead people? your reasoning allows for them as well doesn't it?

Shams
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Post by Mehreen1221 »

Shams, you know, you've just revived the Halloween spirit to the max. anyways, first of all, make sure to get the consent from the owner of that poor animal or survivor of the dead person that you're gonna hump on... also check the legal jurisdictions in your area regarding that and if you cannot get that and if you really wanna get laid with a bear, horse, dog, donkey, lion or giraffe, go to African safari. Plus be aware of wild rabies that you might get thru those beasts and/or may get killed by the relatives of the dead person(s). By 'what' I was just suggesting a velvet or satin sofa or pillow, cushion or something, but oh well, I underestimated you...
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